I do not want to be a lab specimen

I’m young,
I want to be happy
I want to feel love
I want to splash in the falls
and capture their beauty.
I want to explore new places.
To uncover new ground.

I don’t want to be explored.

My body is my own.
I don’t want to be touched.
I don’t want to be hurt.
And yet people and people
they all hurt me.
They all want to explore my body
like a treasure map.

What did I do wrong?
Why does this happen over and over again?
And even when I say no.

I met a boy,
I didn’t want to hug him.
I didn’t want to kiss him.
And everytime I saw him,
he picked me up,
and tried to kiss me.
And I said NO.
and he persisted.

They always persist,
they don’t understand limits,
no, they don’t care about limits.

My body has been studied,
by more perpetrators than I can count.
and even though I am young,
I can count high.
And yet it seems,
that no matter how many times
a person plays with me –
more research needs to be done
by a different scientist.

I DO NOT WANT TO BE A LAB SPECIMEN.
I do not want to be the doll whose head gets pulled off
I don’t want to spread my legs,
or turn over on my tummy.
I am young.
I want to have fun.
and play.
and trust.
and love.

I do not want to live in fear.

-cdk

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